She says her husband has dementia and isn’t interested in having sex with her. He has suggested she find someone for a relationship as long as she comes home afterward to care for him. Her ex-husband, who has remarried, seems to be the best choice for a sexual partner. She wonders what she should do.
I said:
From the way you pose your question it seems you have made up your mind that your current husband’s condition has freed you up to seek comfort with your former husband, whom you apparently don’t want to consider remarried and out of bounds.
Are you seeking approval to continue into something more intimate with your ex-husband? You won’t find it here. It’s time to get out of his life, let him and his current wife alone, and devote yourself to the man to whom you are currently married.
Life isn’t always fair. In this case, you are married to a man older than yourself who has an infirmity that certainly causes severe problems within your relationship. You could take this has a challenge and try to make his and your life the best it can be.
If you cannot accept the responsibilities within this marriage, you have some difficult decisions to make. If you choose to get out of this marriage, do it by yourself, without your ex husband. He’s a married man.