Marriage To An Alcoholic

They’ve been married for four years and have a young son. She says her husband’s alcohol abuse is ruining their marriage. She wanted my advice.

I said:

If your husband was in love with another woman and not alcohol, what would you do? Everything you want comes second to his love for booze. Words are cheap, action is much harder, which is why he says he loves you but doesn’t show you by giving up the alcohol.

He’s wrong, you aren’t responsible for “making” him drink. If you were, you could make him stop. It’s your choice. Stay where you are and live this life or take the steps to make a better life for yourself and your child.

Children of alcoholics have a lot of programming to overcome. How much longer do you want to expose your young son to the effects of his father’s drinking? How much longer will you endanger his life?

Join Al-Anon, get counseling for yourself, do whatever it takes to get past the fear of taking the right step. I can’t do it for you. Neither can anyone else.

Divorce is never nice. But living with an alcoholic is uglier. My mother was an alcoholic and so was my first husband. I speak from experience.