Probably the biggest and most worrisome issue facing divorced women is the question of what is the right time to have sex with someone they’re dating. When personal, moral or religious convictions prohibit sex without marriage, then the answer is simple: “Not until we’re married.”
For the vast majority of singles, the issue of when to become sexually intimate is more complicated. Will a man think less of you if you are “too easy”? It’s possible. And what does “too easy” mean to him?
Despite the equality gained by women in other areas, sexual equality is at best an “iffy” situation. The older the man, the more the possibility he grew up with a “nice women don’t” mentality. In reality, “nice women” do. It’s more a question of “when.”
A second question is “why.” Is sex the payback for an expensive evening out? Is it the “hook” to force commitment? Are you having sex with him so he’ll like you? Is it because he pressures for sex? HIV, AIDS and STDs are good reasons to focus on the nature of a relationship before taking it to a physical level.
When should you have sex with someone you’re dating? Everyone must follow their own moral code when it comes to sexual intimacy. As far as when to have sex with someone you’re dating, here’s what I think:
Never on a first date. No matter how strong the attraction, no matter how liberated he thinks he is, if you have sex with him on the first date, he’ll never believe it’s the first time you’ve ever done such a thing, even if it is. He’ll peg you as easy, not only for him but for anyone you date.
Never on a second date regardless of how insistant he is or how much you’d like to jump into bed with him. It’s only one date away from your first date for him to have much respect for you later.
Never on a third date particularly if he suggests by words or actions that it’s time for a payback for the money he has been spending. If sex is his only motivation for dating you, why sell youself short?
When to have sex with someone you’re dating is strictly up to you and what I think doesn’t matter. What you think about yourself is extremely important. Regardless of how long you have been dating someone, if you’re unable to discuss safe sex techniques and insist that protection be used, then it’s not the right time for the two of you to have sex. Sex without protection can be deadly.
When to have sex should be your choice, your decision.