After 25 years, his wife wants out of their marriage. He admits that their marriage has problems and says he hasn’t been the best husband. They’ve been barely speaking and sleeping in separate bedrooms. He wants her to go to counseling with him but says she isn’t willing to attempt to fix what’s broken. He’s facing a job transfer as well as divorce.
I said:
You can’t change her mind if she’s already decided. The only thing you can do is work on your own feelings and make certain that you don’t get hurt in this separation/divorce.
You are on an obvious path right now. Find out what your legal options are and do whatever you consider best for the kids and yourself. Please don’t drag them into the middle of this, trying to make them see your side or making them choose between you and their mother. Single-parent homes are much more common now than they were when you were a kid so they’re not in an unfamiliar territory as they probably have classmates and friends who are going through the same thing.
The job transfer might be a good thing, but only you can make that decision, factoring in what’s best for your children and your marriage.